Have you heard the myth that says some people can orgasm through sex while others can’t? Well, don’t believe it. Everyone can learn how to orgasm during sex; it just takes a little practice and a lot of patience.
If you use the following four sex techniques correctly, you are going to be able to have an orgasm every time you have sex:
1. Learn to relax. This is the most important factor you need to master if you want to have enjoyable orgasms. You need to understand that there is a vicious cycle that people often fall into when trying to reach orgasm during sex. They get uptight because they are not getting closer to orgasm and this makes it more difficult to actually orgasm.
So, in order to proactively relax and let go, have sex in a place that makes you feel safe and relaxed, for example your own bedroom. Pamper yourself before you have sex. For example, take a nice, long bath or shower. Then, afterwards, slip into something really comfortable.
A surprisingly powerful way to relax is for your partner to say, “You are not allowed to orgasm tonight” or “I don’t want you to orgasm.” It works a little like reverse psychology and many people find that this takes just the pressure off them that they need in order to climax.
2. Make foreplay last longer. Both men and women enjoy foreplay, and it ultimately leads to stronger and more powerful orgasms for both sexes. Make sure your partner knows this!
So, how long should foreplay last? Ideally, it should last for at least 20 minutes, but it can last for much longer. By spending up to two hours caressing, kissing, massaging and rubbing your body, you will both be more relaxed and aroused than if foreplay only lasted for three minutes. And being more relaxed and aroused means that reaching orgasm will be far, far easier.
3. Turn off the lights and turn on some music. Turning the lights off when you have sex has a powerful effect. If you are self-conscious about your body, you’ll find that having sex in the dark takes away a lot of the pressure.
In the dark, your partner can’t see your body, he can’t make eye contact with you and he can’t see what you are doing. This takes a lot of the anxiety out of sex for many people.
Listening to music is great for filling the room with sound that drowns out the sounds you and your partner are making. It can also turn you on and add extra eroticism to your sex session if it’s a band or artist that puts you in the mood.
Think of it as fun homework! Spend a few nights alone in bed, learning about what you enjoy, what turns you on and what brings you closer to orgasm. It could be direct clitoral stimulation, penetration with a dildo or vibrator, or even simple sipple stimulation.
No matter what it is that arouses you and turns you on the most, it’s important to find out. When you discover what enables you to orgasm easily, relay the information to your partner so that he can apply what you learned when you’re together.