Researchers asked men and women to rank 55 different sexual fantasies and provide a detailed description of their desires. The results: Ladies fantasize most about sexual submission and romance.
The top three fantasy themes that women reported included specified locations, a spouse or current lover, and a focus on her own submissiveness. Those compliant fantasies ranged from being sexually dominated (64.6 percent), tied up for sexual pleasure (52.1 percent), and spanked or whipped (36.3 percent).
So how can you make some of her (safer) desires come true? Get her to open up about her kinky cravings by first offering up your own, Once she gives you the green light, help her live out her fantasy in a gentle way—and under her direction.
It’s just a matter of restraining certain areas so she sort of fights against you. Instead of handcuffing her to the bedpost, gently hold down her wrists during missionary, or put extra pressure on her hip bones during oral. Pressing her firmly onto the mattress and holding her still to prevent wiggling gives her a sense of being dominated, safely and respectfully.
If her sexual fantasies don’t involve male domination, but focus more on a change of scenery, try moving sex outside the bedroom. It feels like a whole new toy. A different time of day, a different temperature, a different kind of light—all that changes it up completely.”